Fickle Pickle…what a great little eatery in the USA close to Atlanta, Georgia. We met some longtime friends there three years ago for lunch as we were driving through Georgia. It was a great lunch and visit down memory lane.
There is another kind of fickle and that’s Fickle Memory. Living this expat life, I have faced this fickle and must guard against it.
So, what’s a Fickle Memory? A memory that triggers the emotion of dissatisfaction. It begins with a longing; turns into “I wish I was…” or “I wish I wasn’t…”; and then plummets to dissatisfaction spiraling to the pit of despair. This Fickle Memory robs us of the JOY of the present. It blinds us to the new thing in our life. When we embrace a Fickle Memory, we become engulfed with what use to be and what we don’t have now.
In my current life as an expat, I have found that I could have many Fickle Memory moments. Memories can pop up at unexpected times. I have also realized there are some calculated times that these memories occur. When? Holidays is a big one. Birthdays is another. Season changes like the coming of Fall in the USA. The Fall was filled with many activities and sentimental events that I enjoyed in the USA including the colors, smells, foods, hikes, fires, etc. I have found that I cannot linger in these memories very long. I want to enjoy the memories AND avoid them becoming FICKLE. So, what do I do?.....
1. I become AWARE of the downward tilt of
my emotions and STOP the memory.
2. I REFOCUS on the PRESENT. I think on
the GOOD things in my life now, and the
HOPE that is in my future.
3. I ENGAGE in current activities that bring
JOY to me.
4. I CHOOSE JOY and CONTENTMENT.
5. I REMEMBER and rehearse my
PURPOSE for expat living.
6. I BUILD NEW routines and create
7. I remember and honor the past.
Then I LET IT GO.
I move from being the caterpillar to
the emerging butterfly.
My wish for you is that your memories bring satisfaction (not the fickle dissatisfaction) as well as encouragement to embrace the new things that are in your present and in your future.
Enjoy the changing seasons of Life!
John and Cindy write about their adventures, observations, and other nuggets from living in another nation. Their residence is in SE Asia.