Thoughts on Expat Living

This seemed to be a good time to highlight expat living…living in a nation that is not your own (not your home or birth nation).

For me, Vietnam is my heart nation, but at the same time, it is not my home nation.

As one expat friend said, once you go to another nation, your worldview (how you view the world and yourself in that world) changes. So, yes, living overseas for the past 7½ years has definitely changed me. When I come back to the States for a visit, it always takes me a bit to readjust. And I have realized that sometimes you just have to learn to live life feeling a little bit like a “fish out of water”.
​
What I want to highlight in this blog is the coming and the going…and especially the going…of expats. Expats usually tend to live in a nation for short term stints (under a year to 2 years) or long term stints (10 to 20 years or more). You live with the reality that there will come a time that an expat friend will leave. Also, because the expat life tends to be back and forth between here and there (the current nation of residence and the home nation) there can be a lot of extended travel with different life situations. As an expat, you do have to learn to live with some uncertainty. You have to learn to live loosely…having roots but also knowing how to uproot, at times uprooting often. In my experience, the most odd and difficult feeling to cope with is the sense of grief as you see friends leaving. At these times, a season is closing for them and a new season is opening, but in a new place. So the friendship is something that is in flux. You may have enjoyed weekly gatherings of fellowship together over the past 1, 2, or more years, and then it changes. They move on…not just to another town, but to another nation. I wouldn’t say this is bad, I would just say it is different. It requires adjustments in your own self.

I have learned to not fall into the pit of staying aloof from expats. That is an option that some choose. They never really make deep friendships. They think it will help them avoid the sinking feeling that can come when a close friend’s time arrives to move into a new season in a new nation. But the cost of this option is really high. You miss the richness of the friendship that can be enjoyed for the season. You are living in fear of tomorrow. You are avoiding feeling and growing.

Time of fellowship as we say “see you later” to one of our friends.

I have also learned in this age of technology “connection” can be defined and accomplished in ways that those in the past never imagined. We just came through a period where Zoom and such apps have opened a whole new world of connection to use across the globe! We do have to be intentional to learn it and to use it. We do have to see a different way…re-adjust our worldview yet again. But the opportunities on the other side of that adjustment can be phenomenal.

One last bit of learning for me…I don’t say “good-bye”, I say “see you later” or “see you again”. I do believe in an eternal connection that I share with my friends. They may not be in my current location and my present weekly activities, but at the same time I do believe they are in my future. We have been connected for eternity. And at times our thoughts will turn to each other. We might think for no apparent reason…but these are good times to remember them with love and shower them with prayers and blessings.
​
Cheers to expat life! And learning to thrive in change.